An Unloved WIfe

Used with permission by Dr. Carolyn A. Roth www.CarolynRothMinistry.com Hosea lived in the Northern Kingdom of Israel about the middle of the 8th century before Christ. From the time the Norther Kingdom separated from Judah, the people worshiped idols.  Hosea was God’s prophet. When God told Hosea to marry an idolatrous woman, he married Gomer.  She had three children. Possibly, Hosea was the father of only the first son, or none of the children were his. The Bible recorded that Gomer’s children were children of adultery and conceived in disgrace. Unfaithful during her marriage to Hosea, Gomer had few qualms about leaving him. She believed she could have a better life with various lovers than with Hosea. Gomer left the three children with Hosea; after all, children would only curtail her wanton lifestyle. After leaving Hosea, Gomer took lovers and prostituted herself.  Eventually, living as a prostitute stopped being glamorous.  As Gomer aged, she lost some of her beauty. Men ceased clamoring for her attention.  They wanted someone younger and fresher. Gomer realized that what she left behind with Hosea was better than what she had now. Unthinking or uncaring that she hurt or embarrassed Hosea; Gomer asked Hosea if she could return. His answer was “No way.” He didn’t want Gomer back in either his home or in his bed if she was going to continue her wanton behavior.  Hosea's refusal to take Gomer back must have been okay with God. The Bible provided no indication that God gave Hosea any direction at that point. Destitute, Gomer had no option but to sell herself into slavery so she had food to eat.  We don’t know what she did as a slave. Hopefully, Gomer’s slavery was household or even field work, rather than acting as a sex slave to many men.      What a really sad story for both Hosea and Gomer. Let’s drill down into their relationship to try to make sense of what was happening to both spouses. First, Hosea and Gomer had little affection for each other. Hosea married Gomer because God told him to marry a prostitute. Likely, he had some other type of woman in mind for marriage. Conceivably, Gomer wanted out of her family’s home and the freedom allowed a married woman in society. Perhaps, she was pregnant and needed a husband to cover her shame.  When God told Hosea to marry an adulterous woman, he didn’t direct Hosea to love the woman. In ancient Israel, kinship regulated marriage. Possibly, Gomer was Hosea’s cousin or second cousin. Relative or not, marriage to a harlot brought great shame on Hosea’s entire family. Shame multiplied when the family learned that Gomer was unfaithful and left Hosea. Hosea’s primary relationship was with God. To Hosea it was important to obey God, even if that meant he had an unfaithful wife and humiliated kinsmen.  In Hosea 3:1, God told Hosea not only to redeem Gomer from slavery but to love her. Only at this point did God require Hosea to engage his emotions – he must love a woman who left him for other men. Loving Gomer was harder for Hosea than marrying Gomer. After Hosea purchased Gomer from slavery, he set clear boundaries for their life together: Gomer must not prostitute herself or belong to another man. Hosea would act the same toward Gomer until she has proven her loyalty to him. Only then, would marital relations be resumed. Apparently, Hosea wasn't about resuming sexual relations with Gomer until she proved her loyalty to him; but, he was willing to also be loyal to her in the interim. God gave Israel the same direction for being wed to him as Hosea gave Gomer. The Israelites must stop worshiping other gods. Before God accepted them back into full fellowship, they must repent. If Israel complied, God would restore a full marital relationship between the Israelites and himself. We don’t know if Hosea and Gomer’s husband-wife relationship was ever restored; however, we know that a short time later the Israelites were conquered by the Assyrians and dispersed throughout the Assyrian empire. The Northern Kingdom of Israel didn’t comply with God’s requirements to be a faithful wife.