A Great Example of the Definition of "Oxymoron"

"Oxymoron" -  Removing the Ten Commandments from the courthouse while making people in court swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you GOD.  While your hand is on the BIBLE!  

 

White (Lie) Cake

Author unknown - Thanks to Janis Weber Williamson in Tennessee for sending this!

Have you ever told a white lie? You are going to love this, especially all of those who bake for church events. 

Alice Grayson was to bake a cake for the Baptist Church Ladies' Group in Tuscaloosa , but forgot to do it until the last minute.  She remembered the morning of the bake sale; and, after rummaging through cabinets, found an angel food cake mix & quickly made it while drying her hair, dressing, and helping her son pack for Scout camp.

When Alice took the cake from the oven, the center had dropped flat and the cake was horribly disfigured.  She thought, 'Oh dear, there is not time to bake another cake.'

This cake was important to Alice because she did so want to fit in at her new church and in her new community of friends.  So, being inventive, she looked around the house for something to build up the center of the cake.

Alice found it in the bathroom - a roll of toilet paper. She plunked it in and covered it with icing. Not only did the finished product look beautiful, it looked perfect.

Before she left the house to drop the cake by the church and head for work, Alice woke her daughter Amanda and gave her some money and specific instructions to be at the bake sale the moment it opened at 9:30 and to buy the cake and bring it home.

When Amanda arrived at the sale, she found the attractive, perfect cake had already been sold.  She grabbed her cell phone and called her mom.

Alice was horrified - she was beside herself. Everyone would know!  What would they think? She would be ostracized, talked about, and ridiculed!  All night, Alice lay awake in bed thinking about people pointing fingers at her and talking about her behind her back.

The next day, Alice promised herself she would try not to think about the cake and would attend the fancy luncheon/bridal shower at the home of a fellow church member and try to have a good time.  Alice did not want to attend because the hostess was a snob who more than once had looked down her nose at Alice because she was a single parent and not from the founding families of Tuscaloosa, but having already sent her RSVP, she couldn't think of a believable excuse to stay home.

The meal was elegant, the company was definitely upper crust old South and to Alice 's horror, the cake in question was presented for dessert!   Alice felt the blood drain from her body when she saw the cake!

She started out of her chair to tell the hostess all about it, but before she could get to her feet, the Mayor's wife said, 'What a beautiful cake!'

Alice still stunned, sat back in her chair when she heard the hostess (who was a prominent church member) say, 'Thank you, I baked it myself.'

Alice smiled and thought to herself, 'God is good.'

Memorization in General / Memorizing Ten Commandments

HELP WITH MEMORIZATION (MNEMONICS)

All ages will find these memorization tips helpful.  Never underestimate the memory of very young children!  That's when memorization comes the easiest, so take advantage of their wonderful minds, especially in scripture memorization!

The Great Lakes, in order from west to east:
Sam's Horse Must Eat Oats
Superior, Huron, Michigan, Erie, Ontario
 

The 4 Oceans:

I Ate Artichoke Pizza.
(Indian, Arctic, Atlantic, Pacific)  

The 7 Continents:
Eat An Aspirin After A Nighttime Snack

Europe, Antarctica, Asia, Africa, Australia, North America, South America

The Colors of the Rainbow, in order:
ROY G. BIV (pronounced like a person's name)
Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet

The Planets in order:
My Very Educated Mother Just Sent Us Nine Pizzas
Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto. Disclaimer: Pluto has lost its planetary standing, now, so we'll have to learn a new one.

Do a search on Google to find a mnemonic for other specific things.  Example: "Mnemonic for _________."  

MEMORIZING THE TEN COMMANDMENTS (Exodus 20)
by Jodee Kulp - 2001 Copyright

Key Sentence:  "Our God Now Shows His Kids About Sin with Commandments."
(Or make up your own sentence.)

This sentence should be written on the blackboard and repeated over and over, at least once after each commandment.  Go through each commandment, stating what it means in simple terms, then saying the sentence 2 times or so.

The key to this presentation is ENERGY!

1. OUR -  "O" in "Our"stands for OTHER. "Thou shalt have no OTHER gods before me" (v3)
2. GOD -  "G" stands for GRAVEN. "Thou shalt not make unto thee any GRAVEN image"(v4)
3. NOW - "N" is for NAME-"Thou shalt not take the NAME of the Lord thy God in vain." (v7)
4. SHOWS -  "S" is for SABBATH. "Remember the SABBATH day to keep it holy." (v8)

   You might also mention here 2 things. The first 4 commandments deal with man's relationship to God. The next 6 relate to man's relationship with man. Additionally, this is the only commandment that is not repeated in the New Testament, yet the concept of rest and reflection is an important thing we should do.

5. HIS - "H" stands for HONOR. "HONOR thy father and thy mother." (v12)
6. KIDS - "K" is for KILL. "Thou shalt not KILL." (v13)

   The word kill here has the literal meaning of murder. I always tell the children this isn't talking about squashing a bug.

7. ABOUT - "A" is for ADULTERY. "Thou shalt not commit ADULTERY"(v14)

   When men and women are married to each other they make a vow that they will be faithful to one another. If they break this promise it is sin.

8. SIN - "S" is for Steal "Thou shalt not STEAL" (v15)
9. WITH - "W" is for WITNESS. "Thou shalt not bear false WITNESS against thy neighbor" (v16)
10. COMMANDMENTS - "C" is for COVET. "Thou shalt not COVET..." (v17)