Our Plans For A Simple Christmas + 25 Non-Toy Gift Ideas

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Our Plans For A Simple Christmas + 25

Non-Toy Gift Ideas

With the lights  twinkling on the tree behind us, my husband and I sat and contemplated Christmas and what we want it to look like in our family. We each have beautiful childhood memories of Christmases past and now it’s our turn to share the magic. We thought a lot about possibly having a non-toy Christmas.
(In sharing this I want to be sure to tell you that this is what works for our family and I’m not under the assumption that it must work for everyone.)
One thing we both feel very strongly about is making sure that the Christmas we teach to Scarlette is not a completely consumerist one.
This is hard for me. Scarlette is (and will be) an only child, long awaited and much celebrated. I (and my love of a good deal) want to give her the world.
Plus, I am a gift giver. It’s my love language. I just like to give people stuff. And I love my Black Friday sales with the best of them, y’all.
I counted the gifts we purchased for Scarlette last year on one hand. “It looks so small” I lamented. First World Problems at their finest, right?
What do we want her to know? That Christmas is about giving. Namely, the gift of a Christ child to a world who was in desperate need of a Savior. And that we give in that spirit, of presents and of time and of love, to honor the greatest gift ever bestowed.
So we drastically changed how we do gifts around here. For her birthday, she got one toy and a special cupcake outing from Mommy and Daddy. (And if you’ve seen this video, you know that she was the happiest kid ever.)
Instead we’ve decided to focus on advent activities and gifting to our community. We still exchange gifts but on a much smaller scale with more intention.
Now that we’re on our third year of Christmas/birthdays in this vein and figuring this out a little more, here are 25+ suggestions for non-toy gift ideas! (some referral links included b/c coupons!)

Experience Gifts

Right now our three year old daughter, Scarlette, is in ballet class because she asked to be. (She did not get that from her rhythm-less mama.!) She knows that the classes are a gift from her grandparents and I find that really special. I’m thankful to them for being a part of giving her new experiences and creating special memories with her when they take her on outings. I typically visit GROUPON’s local things-to-do page to find some fantastic experience gifts for over half off. This year I bought some great packages for family members through them!
1.) Memberships to a children’s museum or the zoo. My dad took Scarlette to the zoo this year and she talks about it all the time. Seriously. ALL THE TIME.
2.) Paint Your Own Pottery trip. We love doing this. It is so fun and you don’t have to make something you bring home, you can have your child make something like a pretty vase to donate to the local nursing home.
3.) Tickets to the movies, theater production, or concert. I’m wishing that Super Why Live would come anywhere near us because my three year old would have the time of her life at a show like that. Fandango lets you personalized their gift cards with a photo, which is a cute way to give a movie ticket gift!
4.) Gift certificates to a favorite ice cream/cupcake shoppe. Because we all scream for ice cream. Except Scarlette. She screams for cupcakes. Or also just randomly, for no good reason.
5.) Gift certificates for a family outing, such as ice skating or mini golf. Or, if they are teenagers and are embarrassed to be seen with you because you feel the need to dance in public (MOM) then maybe for a friends outing. (I was scarred for life, y’all.)
6.) Crafting or baking dates. My mother made Scarlette this canopy for her bed as her Christmas gift last year. Scarlette was SO excited about it. And my favorite gift from my Aunt every year from the time I was a little girl has ALWAYS been her homemade butter mints. Of all the gifts I received at our family gathering, I always looked most forward to when I opened my tin of homemade butter mints from her.

Subscription Gifts

Don’t think kids can’t enjoy things like magazine subscriptions! Scarlette gets Ladybug magazine every month and she loves it. She enjoys getting the mail with me and having a “pwize” in it. We also love our subscription boxes. Most offer a one-time option in addition to a 3,6,9, and 12 month plan so there is something for every budget.
7.) Magazine subscription (we love Ladybug, Highlights and National Geographic Kids)
8.) A Book-Of-The-Month Club! Lollipop Book Club mails a lollipop and a book with a specially inscribed note each month. I love that idea! You could even probably do the same thing yourself for less, just remember to mail the book each month! I also love the look of GiftLit because you can choose from all ages, including read-aloud family books!
9.) Monthly Craft Kit. Kiwi Crate is a monthly craft club for kids. Each month you receive a box with supplies and instructions to make themed crafts that encourage creativity and learning. This is our favorite one, we got a subscription for Scarlette last year and she really looks forward to her box every month and my niece is getting a subscription this year. You can save 50% on your 1st month subscription to any Kiwi Crate Family Brands PLUS free shipping with code HOLIDAY50 – For kids under 4 their Koala Crate is fantastic and they also have Tinker Crate for older kids that is more STEM focused.   Similar crafting kits are: Green Kids Crafts and Babbabox.
10.) Monthly Learning Kit. Little Passports is a monthly travel adventure kit. It’s for an older age range than Scarlette, maybe 7+ but it is so cute! You can do the world edition or the USA edition and “visit” different countries/states each month!
11.) Baby Essentials Subscription. If you have a baby, then a subscription or bundle from The Honest Company is a great choice for you. You can do the diaper subscription and get eco-friendly diapers + natural wipes delivered monthly (WHO DOESN’T LOVE THAT?!) or you can get natural bath & body products, kid’s toothpaste and more. And let’s be honest: your baby has no idea what is happening on Christmas. The diaper bundle is where it is at. This makes such a great gift for a new mom!

Digital Gifts

Some people dislike giving digital gifts because they like having something to unwrap. But you can still make a cute present out of something like a Netflix subscription by printing out the gift code and wrapping it up in a fun popcorn tin!
12.) Online Learning. We use www.abcmouse.com for early learning and we love it. Scarlette gets to do a lesson or two on it a few days a week and it is such a great learning tool. It is designed for toddlers up to Kindergarten age and is full of educational lessons that are presented as games, puzzles, books, songs, and more. She earns “tickets” for each lesson she completes and trades them in for prizes. She’s currently obsessed with buying things for her fish tank with her tickets. (This link will give you the first month free to try it out)
13.) Netflix. Netflix is our go-to in this cable-free house. It’s such a great gift because it has an entire kids-only section with tons of family favorites and educational shows. We watch a lot of the nature shows. And after the kids use it, mom and dad can totally have a movie date night in.
14.) Educational App. I love the Kindle Free Time Unlimited App that I have for my Kindle Fire. It’s only $2.99 a month and it is full of educational games and books that I can let Scarlette read without worrying about her accidentally deleting my stuff or buying billions of dollars of e-books.
15.) Gift cards. Gift cards to Amazon or iTunes for digital books, apps or music are good bet for the teen crowd. Or thirty year olds with a penchant for YA dystopian fiction series. Just sayin.’ Fandango gift cards are also a great idea because there are a ton of good YA movies coming out this year!

Learning Aids

And if you just really like wrapping stuff, I love getting hands on learning items for Scarlette. Musical instruments, craft supplies, etc. are all helpful to this homeschool-ish mom and things that my kid enjoys.
16.) Extracurricular activity items. If your child is signed up for ballet, a tutu makes a great gift. Just ask Scarlette. I can’t get her to take off the one she got for her birthday. It’s kind of a problem, actually.
17.) Musical Instruments. We love these rhythm sticks by Hohner Kids. And by “we” I mean “Scarlette.” No parents like these. Also, this harmonica is like, five dollars. And it’s a harmonica. Everyone likes the guy who can play a harmonica! We also have this wooden xylophone and this little drum that Scarlette loves. This year Scarlette got this kid’s cd player for her birthday – she LOVES listening to books on cd (this set is her favorite) and singing along to Frozen karaoke in the microphones. I liked it because it also has an mp3 and usb hookup so I can download music for her online.
18.) Arts & Craft Supplies. It’s so nice in the winter months to have a go-to craft bin in the house. Chenille sticks, googley eyes, glue, feathers, construction paper, scissors, popsicle sticks, watercolors, markers, etc. are all great things to bundle together in a little craft set. I normally pick these up at craft stores or you can grab an oversized arts and crafts bucket like this one. We store ours in these stackable ArtBins.
19.) Books. I love giving and receiving classic books. I think you can’t go wrong with classics like Shel Silverstein’s Where The Sidewalk Ends, Anne of Green Gables, The Secret Garden, Where The Wild Things Are, etc. and I am all about fostering a love of reading in kids. Oh, and I love LOVE the Jesus Storybook Bible.
20.) Learning Activities. I’m against ant farms on account of how I read the Scary Stories books when I was a child and still have nightmares but I do love nature stuff. Scarlette has a magnifying glass we use to look at bugs that was her favorite gift ever. On her list of things that she is thankful for, number two is BUGS. I also love things like these wooden pattern blocks that my dad gave Scarlette for her birthday. We can do so many learning activities with them that even though they might be technically a toy, I give them a pass. I also love Lisa’s printable activity sets.
21.) Clothes. Okay, that might have nothing to do with learning but I had no category for it. Technically, we’re learning how to dress ourselves over here. Well, the three year old is. But kids need clothes, y’all. They grow real fast. I also think that some of the handmade locket necklaces would  make a great, sentimental gift for a teenage girl. And I’m all about building a dress-up box out of clearance sales and thrift store finds because imaginative play is brain power. Or maybe not, I just made that up but I bet it’s good for kids or something.

The Gift Of Giving

I think it’s important to teach our kids about charitable giving from a young age. Here are a few ideas organizations that I personally like and support, but having your child research, learn about, and choose a charity that is personal to them is awesome. It’s a sweet opportunity to teach our kids about giving beyond ourselves.
22.) Giving to a local need. We do something for families in the local NICU each year at Christmas time and ask that our friends and family consider donating in Scarlette’s name, to share a little bit of the hope that we have now and that we so wanted back when it was us there during the holiday season. You can make blankets or crochet preemie hats or any number of things!
23.) Sole Hope. Sole Hope is an organization that does medical work in Uganda and helps local men makes shoes for the kids there. I got to meet them last month and was so impressed with them that on my next Girl’s Night, I made my girlfriends watch the video and cut out shoes out of old jeans with me. It’s not at all annoying to be friends with me y’all. I think it’s a good organization for older kids/teens to be a part of because they can host fun shoe-cutting parties and be actively participating in the mission.
24.) Freeset. Freeset is a fair trade business that employees women who are trying to escape the sex trade. (I know that seems heavy for a Christmas gift but well, the greatest Christmas Gift the world received was born into a pretty heavy burden and I think it’s especially important to remember these girls in this season.) The women make beautiful bags (and laptop sleeves!) so this is another gift that you can wrap up while giving back. Another organization that I was able to meet face to face last month who truly impressed me.
25.) Light Em’ Up Giving. Check out Courtney DeFeo’s Light Em’ Up guide, with tons ideas for random acts of kindness that you can do with your children during the holiday season. I love the way this is set up, with printables and helpful ideas. We’ll be doing some of these with Scarlette this year and I am really looking forward to it.
26.) Choose A Gift Catalog. Several reputable charitable organizations like World Vision have gift catalogs that you can browse with your child. Scarlette loves farm animals right now so we’re going to discuss giving a family the gift of livestock and then I’ll let her choose from there.
We’re not totally anti-toy. After all, I hit up the Target Secret Toy Sale to stock up on books and gifts. But we do try to keep the balance weighted towards more handmade gifts, experience gifts and secondhand gifts than lots of brand new piles under the tree and this has been what has helped us
Whenever this topic comes up among my girlfriends they always ask how we broach this with family members. We definitely don’t want to take away the joy of giving from others or infringe our own feelings on anyone else but we did share our hearts with them and ask them to consider experience or non-toy gifts. We’re thankful that her grandparents were incredibly understanding of our space (our house is small and I have a problem with clutter. Like, I make a lot of it.) and our hearts and purposed to honor our requests. Plus, I send them videos of Scarlette taking the ballet class they gave her and that is just the gift that keeps on giving, y’all.
(And if you are looking for gift ideas for the grown-up kids in your life, I’m partial to an Amazon Prime gift subscription. Two day shipping + free kindle books + free movies/tv shows is basically the gift that keeps on giving.)
 I’d love to hear any suggestions you might have for non-toy gifts!

For more gift ideas and to enter to win some awesome holiday prizes from Pottery Barn Kids, The Land of Nod, Boden and more, visit my 2014 Family Holiday Gift Guide!


Other Christmas Tutorials & Freebies: 12 Fun Free Christmas Fonts | Love You Latte Gift In A Bag | No-Sew Tutu | Free Photo Christmas Card Template | DIY Photo Color-A-Magnet | Printable Calendar Sticker Magnets | Free Christmas Card Template

Fun Ways that Toys Can Help Children Get Ready for Kindergarten

from Creative Homemaking by Rachel Paxton -http://www.creativehomemaking.com
/moms/kindergarten-ready.shtml
Used by permission

Article by Jacob and Carol Maslow

Learning the ABCs and 123s is important but some of the most important skills that new kindergartners need are best learned through play. Children are naturally curious and eager to learn new things, so why not take advantage of playtime to help your child develop the skills that will give them a great head start in school?

Pattern Power

Being able to recognize and replicate patterns is useful for more than just creating pretty designs. Children will call on their skills in classifying objects, sorting them and recognizing patterns as they move on to reading and mathematics. You can help your child develop these skills by making pattern play a part of your everyday life.

One easy way to do this is to use wooden blocks to create patterns and ask your child “What comes next?”. From there, you can move on to having them create patterns for you to complete. Wooden blocks in various shapes can also be sorted by size and shape to help children gain experience in grouping objects by kind.

Special pattern block kits containing various shapes with design pattern cards that can be completed with the blocks are also a fun challenge for young children.

As a bonus, they also reinforce shape and color recognition as well as fine motor skills.

Be on the lookout for patterns in your everyday life, such as alternating tiles on a floor or decorative patterns on furniture and clothing. In no time, your child will delight in pointing out new patterns to you and incorporate them into their artwork.

Fine Motor Skills

Strong fine motor skills will help your child in kindergarten as they master writing and other tasks such as cutting with scissors and gluing. In addition, they will allow your child to be more independent in the classroom. Most kindergarten teachers expect that their students will be able to use the bathroom, put on their coats, hats and mittens and tie their own shoes and may not have the time to help your child each and every time.

Arts and crafts are one of the best ways to help your child develop these skills. While creativity should be encouraged, you can also challenge your child to refine their fine motor skills by showing them how to color in the lines, trace and connect the dots. Help your child learn to use scissors by giving them frequent, supervised opportunities to cut out objects and paste them on paper. Experiment with other mediums such as finger paints, painting with brushes and modeling clay.

Stringing beads is another fun and effective way to strengthen fine motor skills and can also be combined with pattern, shape and color recognition. Wooden puzzles, lacing cards and small blocks are also good choices for developing fine motor skills and hand eye coordination.

Make getting dressed in the morning a game with songs, races and lots of encouragement. While it’s a bit more trouble for you, choose shoes with laces so that your child has an opportunity to learn to tie them. A basic skills board or doll with buttons, snaps, zippers and laces is another fun way to help your child practice these skills.

Social Skills

Children who can sit still for a reasonable amount of time, take turns, share and follow directions have a much easier time in kindergarten. Playtime is an ideal time to reinforce these social skills with your preschooler so that they are able to meet classroom expectations when the time comes.

Reading to your child is one of the best ways to help build their attention span and help them learn to focus on what is being said to them. Mix it up with a combination of traditional books, storytelling and books on cd or MP3 (these are great for in the car or when you need to have your child occupied so that you can cook or shower).

Playing board games is also a good way to model and encourage good social skills. Look for games that are easy enough for a pre-reader to understand and play but that are challenging enough so that your child will still get experience in how to deal gracefully with frustration. Pretend play, especially playing school, is a great way for you to model expectations with your child and allow them to experiment safely with testing the boundaries. This kind of playing is also a good way for children to relieve their anxieties about school in a supportive environment.

Classic playground games like Follow-the-Leader, Simon Says and Mother May I? also help children learn to follow instructions and control their impulses. You can and should incorporate responsibility into your playtime by requiring your child to tidy up and make transitions with a minimum of fuss and reminders.

Love and Support

Perhaps most importantly, playing with your child is one of the best ways to show them that they have your love and support. Children who feel loved and secure are better equipped to meet new challenges and deal with the ups and downs that a day at kindergarten brings.

Co-authors Jacob and Carol Maslow enjoy sharing their experience and expertise on children, toys and the importance of play. In addition to raising five young children, Carol works as a therapist specializing in helping developmentally delayed preschoolers integrate with their classmates. Jacob works at Today's Concept, where parents can find classic toys, including the highly regarded Melissa and Doug brand.

Tried and True Toys and Activities for Children

by Lois Breneman - 1999 - Heart to Heart

Although there are so many new toys that you may think your child or grandchild just has to have, don’t forget these basic toys and activities that have been proven over years and years, to be favorites of children – and no batteries are required!  Many of these items can be found at yard sales and cleaned up, and your children won’t care one bit that you didn’t pay the full price.

BLOCKS of all colors, sizes and shapes – lots of them!  Even empty salt boxes can be saved up for a great construction tool.  I recommend that you remove the metal spout as a safety measure and cover at least the top with colorful contact paper.  Then use different blocks together.  Even picking up the blocks is a good lesson in sorting for your children.

LEGOS are for girls too – not just boys.  Just a few of the creative expressions are cars, trucks, houses, cities, castles, rocket ships, trains, people, or frames around clocks.  The ideas are endless!

ERECTOR SETS, LINCOLN LOGS and TINKERTOYS are other tried and true toys that teach creativity.

PUZZLES are great fun for all ages, while at the same time teaching logic and patience. To encourage very young children, take turns putting a piece in the right place, like a game.  They love to do that and are so proud of their accomplishment when they get it all put together.

GAMES, like puzzles, are for all ages, and teach sportsmanship as well as getting along with others.  Time spent playing games is a great way to bring family members of different generations together.

BALLS can be used to kick, throw, shoot through a hoop, roll, bounce and even sit on.   Endless possibilities!

BOXES are always a favorite of small children, much to the dismay of their parents who have bought an expensive gift, only to see their toddler toss it aside and play with the box for hours!   Make use of boxes as toys and let your kids use their imagination!  If you can find a very large box, why not cut out a door and a few windows for a play house?  My dad made us a great playhouse with a floor one summer and that is a special childhood memory for me.  My sister and I still talk about that and and how we remember the smell of peanut butter sandwiches eaten in that special hideout with our dolls!

SMALL BUCKETS or small plastic boxes are great for putting in and taking out, a favorite of toddlers.  Plastic is good because it makes a noise, which they love.  Save those bright colorful lids from liquid laundry detergents – bright orange, yellow, red, blue, turquoise and white.  They can also be used in the bathtub as well as in the sand, and they're free!

A DRESS-UP BOX with dress-up clothes from Goodwill, thrift shops and garage sales.  You might want to keep them in a big old suitcase to be used in pretending to go on trips.  Stair steps can be the seats of an airplane!  You could play Hawaiian or Mexican music, depending on the destination of their pretend trip.

A CRAFT BOX with crayons, colored pencils, paints, markers, scissors, stickers, glue, paper, and other art supplies will go a long way in providing hours of creativity for your children!  Have another box of things that you save for them to use to make any kind of contraption they desire.  Save paper plates, empty salt boxes, egg cartons, string, yarn, cardboard, old cards, plastic wrap tubes, and all kinds of things you have saved for creative play.

CLAYS in the form of playdough, salt ceramics, cornstarch clay, flour and salt dough and many others will provide fun and creativity.  Books in the library will give even more ideas in this area.

DOLLS teach young children how to be caring and loving.  A bed can be made from a shoebox and covered with contact paper or glued on fabric.  Then make a small blanket.  Time spent creating toys with your children is a memory maker too.

PUPPETS and MUPPETS can be handmade or purchased for lots of creative fun!  Find a book in the library on puppets and make a cardboard theater for puppet shows.   This could be a special feature at your children’s birthday parties too. 

A TOY CASH REGISTER, TOY MONEY AND A TOY SHOPPING CART are the beginning of your children’s own store!  Save empty food boxes.  Children could add price stickers and learn math better while they have fun.  Until children are old enough for the math, they can still have fun with a shopping cart, play food and cash register.

A TENT made from a folding table is a favorite of very young children, even if it’s just for hiding from everyone and playing peek-a-boo!  Drape a large blanket or quilt over the table.   Or you could sew a tent from heavy fabric, and include a door and windows to drape over a table! 

A BUG JAR, CRITTER CAGE AND A MAGNIFYING GLASS will provide an outlet for exploration and learning. 

A SAND BOX with scoops, shovels, cars, trucks, buckets, and even a little water to be extra creative will fill many hours with fun!  Save peanut butter buckets and colorful lids from liquid laundry detergents for the sand box.

A TREE HOUSE built with Daddy as a special project and years of fun!

A SPECIAL GARDEN SPOT for each child, if room is available, will teach planning, responsibility, appreciation for God’s vital role in growth, as well as pride and joy as your family eats the fruit of your children’s labor!  I remember as a young child having my own little garden with marigolds, portulacas and other plants.  As a result, gardening has been an enjoyable part of my entire life.

BOOKS, last but certainly not least, are one of the most important items you can purchase for your children!  Read to them each day, beginning with pointing and talking about simple pictures as early as four months! 

Good Old Fashioned Playtime

by Lois Breneman, © 2003, Revised October, 2006

Just this week The American Academy of Pediatrics reported that what children need most for healthy development is more good, old fashioned playtime, rather than full schedules and classes that could sap passion and creativity.  The academy report says that numerous studies have shown that unstructured play has many benefits.  It can help children become creative, discover their own passions, develop problem-solving skills, relate to others and adjust to school settings. 

"Perhaps above all, play is a simple joy that is a cherished part of childhood," says the report, prepared by two academy committees at the group's annual meeting in Atlanta.

The report says a lack of spontaneous playtime can create stress for children and parents alike.  If it occurs because young children are plopped in front of get-smart videos or older children lose school recess time, it can increase risks for obesity.  It may even contribute to depression for many children.

Social pressures and marketing pitches about creating "super children" contribute to a lack of playtime for many families.  But so does living in low-income, violence-prone neighborhoods where safe places to play are scarce, the report says.

It says enrichment tools and organized activities can be beneficial but should not be viewed as a requirement for creating successful children.  Above all, they must be balanced with plenty of free play time, the report says.

Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg, the report's lead author and a pediatrician at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia said, "In the current environment where so many parents feel pressure to be super parents, I believe this message is an important one."

Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, a noted pediatrician and author, praised the report, saying, "I hope it will have some effect."  Children overscheduled with structured activities "are missing the chance they have to dream, to fantasize ... that to me is a very important part of childhood." 

Today there is so much peer pressure for young mothers to begin as early as their child's infancy to get them into "programs" to make their child intelligent.  What very young children do not need is a strict regime of get-smart videos, gymnastics, ballet, karate lessons or T-ball games.  Simply exposing them to good music while playing with blocks, dolls, cars and trucks, a magnifying glass, and toys that don't do all the thinking for them is what they do need.  Romping on the floor with Mom and Dad, playing tag and hide-and-go-seek, catching bugs in a jar, watching ants in action, playing dress-up, and the list goes on!  Ask your parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents what they did as small children, when there were very few toys and certainly few or no toys with batteries!

Although there are so many new toys that you may think your child or grandchild just has to have, don’t forget the basic toys and activities that have been proven over years and years, to be favorites of children – and no batteries are required!  Many of these items can be found at yard sales and after they are cleaned up, your children won’t care one bit that you didn’t pay the full price. 

Most of the basic activities to which I am referring may need some supervision by the parents in the beginning, but soon many toddlers, preschoolers and elementary school age children will be involved in their own individual playtime, using many of these ideas as they learn.  You as their parent will be reaping the great reward of countless smiles and laughter as you watch and listen to their wonderful imaginative independent play!  

So Mothers, please check out the article, Tried and True Toys and Activities for Children.  You can do a search, using the feature in the top right of this blog.

Enjoy the Ride: Make Your Commute Time Count! / Character Counts

by Colleen Langenfeld, Copyright (c) 2003, Used with permission

Are you a commuting parent?  Do you know what that is?  Not just a parent who commutes, but a mom or a dad who must commute WITH their little one each day.  If this is your daily routine, are you making the most of it?  Lower your frustration level and enhance your relationship with your precious child by taking some simple steps to ensure your daily commute time with your child is the best it can be.

For example, if your child is preschool or elementary age: * Fix up several different sets of traveling toys and rotate them. Expect each set to be interesting for about two days in a row; then put that set away for awhile. Upgrade your sets every 6 months or as necessary to keep the interest level high for your child.  Need ideas? Try these:
- Book/puzzle set.
- Magnetic toys set.
- Dress up stuff (hats work great while buckled up and make for a silly game of 'Who Am I?'.
- Beads and strings.
- Handheld video games.
- Traveling art board.
- Puppets, hand and finger variety.
- Plastic dinosaurs, action figures, toy animals, etc.

* Is your child old enough to read? Purchase a question /

answer or trivia-type handheld game appropriate to the age of your child and reserve one commute per week to exploring the questions. Excellent conversation starter plus you will bask in the glory of being the 'expert' for your child. (Really enjoy this; it won't last forever!)

* If your child is preteen/teen, go to the library and check out current-event magazines. Again, a great conversation starter plus an excellent way to pass on your family's values and beliefs.

* Plan your family's weekly menus and grocery lists during one commute.

* Get some audiotapes to listen to together.

* One commute can even be song or music time. Search the library or Internet to gather age-appropriate songs you can learn and enjoy together. Pass on your love of music to your child and listen with him or her to what's 'popular' these days. Again, a tremendous opportunity to share your values with your child.
 
Got teens?
* Ask the question, 'if you could do anything...'. Then listen.
* Ask the question, 'what's bugging you the most these days?' Then REALLY listen.
 
You get the picture.  Carve out a little quality time from a daily grind and watch your relationship with your child blossom. Plus, when the two of you do arrive home, you'll probably both be ready to spend some time alone or with other family members.  The key? No matter what your schedule, make every moment together count.
____________________________________
Colleen Langenfeld delivers deals, tips and creative resources to working moms who want the most out of their homes, families and careers at http://www.paintedgold.com . Sign up for our free newsletter and get an online Creativity Toolkit as our gift to you!

MAKING GOOD CHOICES ~ "CHARACTER COUNTS"
This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts. www.charactercounts.org

        In Florida, two young men, eager to win the admiration of fraternity brothers, removed a stop sign and brought it back as a trophy. In Tennessee, a couple of teenagers were at a party in a high rise apartment and one dared the other to slide down the trash shoot in the hall. In Colorado, an Air Force Academy cadet with a promising future played strip poker with a female classmate and, ignoring her protests, forced her to have sex.
        The Florida boys were convicted of manslaughter after a fatal accident occurred at the intersection without the stop sign. The Tennessee boy who slid down the trash shoot was killed by an automatic trash compactor and his friend is left with guilt and grief. The cadet's military career was destroyed and he may face criminal charges.
        What makes these stories all the more tragic is that we're not talking about bad kids; we're talking about fundamentally decent kids who made really bad choices. That's the recurring nightmare of caring parents. Children seriously damaging themselves physically or emotionally by unwise decisions--engaging in reckless conduct to impress friends, endangering themselves through drugs, alcohol or imprudent sex, or getting involved with irresponsible, manipulative, cruel or selfish people.
        Sure, we want our kids to be successful, good-looking and clever, but it's much more important that they make good choices. This requires more than cultivated instinct.  It requires an ability and willingness to act rationally rather than impulsively and to evaluate situations and anticipate potential consequences.

Should I Give My Little Boy His Own Doll?

2003
April in North Carolina writes, "I agree with you that boys and girls are naturally different. Just another difference between girls and boys -- I wanted my son, who is now 21 months old, to have a baby doll (a boy doll named Bobbie, dressed in blue of course).  I don't buy into the gender neutral thing, but I do think that boys can be very helpful and loving with smaller children and this stems from them being encouraged in that direction.  I think that this keeps them from being bullies later, and helps them to be better daddies even later than that.

My prime motivation though was to begin paving the way for a little brother or sister for my son. So my son has a baby doll complete with hat, booties, pillow, cradle, and multiple blankets. He puts Bobbie to sleep by covering him completely with a blanket, while shushing me and saying 'Night-night' to Bobbie. 

The cutest thing though is when Ryan plays 'Daddy.'  He will get his Cozy Coupe Car and put Bobbie in the front seat, and then slide in next to him and take him for a ride.  He also has a scooter that he takes Bobbie for a ride on. He's not the most gentle father, but his heart is in the right place."

Note from Lois:  I totally agree with little boys having their own boy doll to help teach them how to be loving, gentle and caring.  Both of my sons had a boy doll as toddlers, until about age four or five.  Now a grandson has his daddy's doll.  That did not cause our sons to become less masculine, because, believe me, they were and still are "all boy!"  The daring outdoor activities they enjoy today prove that they also like to take risks, as many men do.  I have seen them both grow up into caring young men, who love children and show love and kindness to me as their mother.  I believe both of our sons will make good husbands and fathers some day.  Of course, this is their mother speaking, and I could be just a tad bit biased.

P.S. Jan, 2011: Both of our sons are indeed good and loving husbands who pitch in and help their sweet wives in many ways.  So far one son is a great father as well, and I know our other son will be when the time comes.

Toys - A Place for Everything and Everything in its Place

by Lois Breneman - Copyright 2010

What to Do with All Those Toys?

Are you bothered by toys spread on the floor throughout your home all day long?  Are you the one at the end of the day picking up the toys after your children are in bed?    How's that low back pain from picking up the toys, after a full day of caring for your children?

Here's a solution if your child is still a baby - so young he can't pick up toys yet.  A unique tool for you would be the "Grabber," sold in department and drug stores.  It's a tool for the elderly, but hey, we're looking for a good solution, and I know this works.  Whatever it takes to get the job done, right?  I used the grabber to pick up and organize a large playroom, sorting all the toys into categories, and it certainly saved my back from a whole lot of stooping!  When your children see you using the grabber, they may want to steal your special tool and do the job themselves!  So let them!  It's a Tom Sawyer trick!   This tool is also great for picking up sticks off the ground after a forceful wind, and I’m sure there are many other uses.

   

Small toys of various categories can be kept in fabric drawstring bags, and hung on hooks on a wall, in order to keep them separated.  Teach your children and visitors the "One Bag at a Time" rule, letting them know they can play with each one, as long as they don't have several bags out at a time.  That rule will need to be enforced by you.  The children will soon associate a certain bag with specific toys, which is a good memory skill.  You will soon find your children know where every toy can be found. 

Toy animals, other than stuffed variety, can go in one bag; small balls in another.  Puzzles, and a host of tiny toys will be kept together and not lost by using this method.   Bins also work well to separate toys, can hold more, and you don't need to hold open a bag as toys are picked up, but they take up more space, and are more costly.  A bag of toys can be grabbed to take along with you if necessary, so maybe you'd want to have an assortment of both storage solutions.

How Do You Get Toddlers and Young Children to Pick up Small Toys?
Recently my three year old granddaughter had a unique response when her mom asked her to pick up her toys, saying matter-of-factly to her mom, "I'm not interested," and walked away!  Many others don’t say this, but still walk away.

Getting toddlers and young children to pick up toys is an issue all parents deal with.  While in our home recently, my sweet two year old grandson wasn't interested in picking up his brand new colorful wooden blocks he got for a gift either.  So I told him I had an idea of a fun way to pick them up.  I came back with a small, clean dustpan with a matching brush!  His eyes lit up and that did it!  He absolutely loved that new way of scooping up his blocks, and with his mommy's help, the job got done quickly. 

A one dollar dustpan saved the day!  That dustpan became his favorite new toy, and he carried it around with him the rest of his time with us!  And, of course, I gave it to him to take home!  A larger dustpan would be a great help as well.  Another idea of getting toys from the floor to a bin or box would be to put them first into a dump truck, then haul them to a bin and dump!