How to Make Fresh Ginger Paste

by Lois Breneman - Heart to Heart - Revised 2015

Ginger helps aid in digestion and does so much more.  Check out the article on "Ginger Benefits" in the side bar to see other reasons to include this in your diet as often as possible. Ginger also adds great flavor to many soups and countless other dishes! 

Pureed ginger paste is available to purchase in small jars at your grocery store.  But I'll share with you how you can easily save money by making your own ginger paste that will be even more fresh than jarred ginger. 

Buy a large hunk or two of ginger root in the produce department of the grocery store.  Cut it apart into easy-to-peel sections, and peel with a vegetable peeler, or scrape with a spoon - whichever works best for you. Slice all the peeled ginger into about 1/2-inch chunks, and put them into a Vita Mix or a good blender with a little water and olive oil.  You will want it to be the consistency of paste, so just add a tiny bit of liquid at first.  Blend until smoothly pureed, and spoon the ginger paste into Tupperware midget cups, very small containers, or an ice cube tray, and freeze for adding flavor, zip, and nutritional benefits to many dishes.  I keep one small container handy in the refrigerator door to add to recipes.

For delicious lemon-ginger tea, drop a few slices of fresh ginger root into a large teacup with a lemon zinger teabag.  Fill with boiling water and steep (covered) for about 5 minutes.  Add stevia and enjoy! 

Cooking Dried Beans for Easy Digestion

by Lois Breneman - Heart to Heart - Revised 2015

Satisfying, versatile, and very inexpensive  -about $1 per pound - at a time when budgets need to be stretched to put gas in our vehicles, and to purchase other essentials!   

I just cooked another four pounds today!  They are delicious with butter, salt, and an herb mix.  Have you ever heard the call for supper, "Hot butter beans, come for supper!"  And these freeze very well for a great, filling addition to many future meals!

A few months ago I shared how to cook beans to be easily digestible.  A nutritionist told me to soak grain overnight by adding 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar for every cup of grain.  However, I adapted the following recipe and found it works just as well without the beans soaking up so much vinegar.

Soak the following overnight in a large Dutch oven or cooking pot:
4 pounds of dried beans, washed thoroughly in a colander (Great Northern or pinto beans are very good)
1 gallon of filtered water
1/2 cup apple cider vinegar

Note: Do NOT add any salt at this point!  Salt will prevent the beans from getting tender.  Salt and season later.

After soaking overnight or at least 8 hours, drain and rinse the beans several times.  Cover with more pure water and bring to a boil.  A foam may cover the top after they come to a boil.  Skim off the foam with a large spoon.  I hold the lid in my left hand and spoon the foam into the lid, then rinse it off, letting it go down the drain.  This needs to be done until the foam is about gone (5 minutes or so).  Simmer beans for about an hour or more until the beans are tender (the time may vary).  I drain the beans unless I plan to make bean soup.  You can season at this point or wait until serving.  

Spoon some of the beans into containers to freeze.  Save some with the liquid for bean soup, and make hummus with the remaining beans for dipping carrots, celery or crackers into this high protein snack.

How to use beans as a Complete Protein: 
By eating a grain with beans, you will have a complete protein (a meat substitute).  Whole grain bread or crackers, rice cakes or crackers, or a bean and rice dish will suffice.

I Am Yours, You Are Mine

2/26/2015 by Michelle Gill - Used by permission   Our relationship with Jesus seems to have stages and seasons like all relationships.  There are rhythms in all of nature, so I assume the seasons are intentional in our growth as well.  When my dad was sick and dying, my twelfth through sixteenth years, God's presence was evident and was about fact.  Even in an insecure environment as a child, I knew Jesus was with me.  I knew the truth.  But when my first husband got the simple flu at the healthy age of twenty-seven and died, Jesus burned in me, like my heart was made of wood and he used a burner, that I am His and He is mine. When I would wake in the night and realize again that I was now alone, I could hear Him.  The Word says in Zephaniah that He sings over us and for that season He allowed me to hear Him.  (I posted on my blog an experience when someone praying over me could also hear it.)  I did not audibly hear Him but I would wake and a song would be rolling through my mind.  I cannot carry a tune and sometimes I would not even be familiar with the song but I would hear the words and the music.  I would wake in the morning unable to think of being alive yet another day and He would fill me with Himself, so I could literally get off of the floor and amazingly at times in joy and always in peace.  My daughter was only four so she would talk to me daily of daddy.  I would look up and ask Him to help me, and He gave me words and kept me together.  He would send people at just the right time.  He placed me in a church six months prior to the Christmas flu tragedy that knew how to take care of me.  For two months they fed me and my family, sent me encouraging messages, helped me move, fix my house, and provided for me. He kept whispering to me over and over again that "I am yours and you are Mine!" Now I am remarried and Casi is eight years old.  I was reading The Circle Maker the other day and was touched by the quote of the author regarding his father-in-law.  He wrote, "He had a familiarity with God that was disarming."  I just sat there and cried.  Oh to know Him like that. Then a short while later I went to let the dog out and opened my front door and there sat a box.  In the box was homemade applesauce, a dozen fresh eggs, frozen ground beef, butter, home canned green beans and pickles, organic ketchup, a roll of paper towels, a gift card to the grocery store, and a little art sign that read "SHE KNEW THAT THE LORD WAS WILD ABOUT HER."  I can't tell you in words what that meant to me.  I have no idea who it was from.  Maybe someone left it at the wrong house, I don't know but I know God meant it for me.  The thoughtfulness of the homemade items to care for me and the statement on the art piece allowed me to hear it from His mouth.  It made me feel again that He sees me, really sees me and knows me. So if someone who reads this newsletter gave me that box, Thank you!  You have no idea how nurturing it was for me.  He says to each one of you "I AM YOURS AND YOU ARE MINE."  Let Him care for you and show you His sweetness.  He is able to heal all.  His tenderness knows no limits.

Two Parents Living in Separate Homes Raisng One Child

by Amanda Jasek - Used by permission

To be apart from your child for any length of time is challenging but when days go by it makes the challenge even harder.   If you are like me or know someone living this out, today my hope is that I can send some encouragement your way through my story and what I have learned in this six year process.

At only eight months old her daddy and I separated.  As in most divorces it was painful, messy and scary.  Dealing with our emotions while deciding what to do with the house, the items in the house, but most of all, our precious baby would be quite a journey. How could we agree to go days without seeing her?  And so, the divorce/custody process began.  After many lawyer visits, co-parenting counseling and court visits the decision was made: Mommy’s house Thursday evening to Friday morning and Daddy’s house from Friday evening to Thursday morning every other week.

Insecurity was huge for me.  Questions of her loving dad and his family more to forgetting me while she was away were hard. The best of all was, “I’m not really a mom because I don’t have my child full time.”  It wrecked me.  Friends and family were scared too and so I prayed.  I remember it so clearly, while I was praying over all these emotions I felt this inner strength come over me and it became so clear - “I am her momma no matter where she is.”  I realized that no matter how many people we encounter in life, there is no replacing Mommy and Daddy.  Realizing my role is where my confidence as a momma began to blossom.  Yes the insecurities still pop up, but God has been and is so faithful to carry me through into a new vision and strength to carry on.

A few things I practice are:

1. Words. NEVER speak ill of Daddy.  He is her heart and I want to nurture that relationship as best I can.

2. Share.  If it is my week with her but something important is going on that Dad wants her to be a part of, I am totally OK with it.

3. Stay engaged. Even though I am not in the home, I keep the relationship open with her dad so in the event she is sick and needs Mommy I can be there.

4. Encourage.  There are only two people that are going to love this kid alike…. Mom and Dad!  Encourage each other of that.

5. Pray.  When a child is away from the other parent it is special to cover the other parent in prayers.

6. Honesty.  A child is not to be split between parents.  Sometimes their heart hurts not being with the other parent and that is OK.  Allow honesty to flow.

7. Confidence.  Be confident in who you are as the parent which provides security.

8. Structure.  What happens at your house does not sway based on what happens at the other home.

9. Talk.  If there is something that concerns me I chat with her dad about it.

10. Trust.  Trust that the other parent does have the best interest of the child at heart.

11. Together.  When a new person is brought into her dad’s life as I am re-married, the “mission statement”, if you will, is “you marry him you marry me.”  We are two parents, two homes…. one mission.

Each family has its own challenges this I know but I encourage you to be the best that you can be!  Pray most, forgive often and embrace each day moment by moment.  And for those times when people ask me where my girl is, I simply reassure them she is with her daddy because she needs both of us.  Most people will react to it the way you respond to it.  Be confident and remember no competition is to be had.  We each have special roles in her life.

Follow Amanda on her blog at http://2himigo.wordpress.com.

As the journey of blending a family & co-parenting continue, there are many growth opportunities Amanda is discovering along the way. With her determination to know God on an intimate level, and her dedication to study the Bible, she has learned many truths – some discovered through tears and some in moments of joy.  It is her passion to share those truths with other women so they too can experience freedom and obtain courage to continue in the journey of life.  Amanda Jasek has been married to her "love from above" for 3 years.  She and her husband, Aaron, reside in VA with their 3 daughters named Alyssa, Stephanie and Madalynn.

Stop Sitting - It May Save Your Life!

by Lynn Bode  www.workoutsforyou.com  -  Used by permission

Even if you try to eat healthy and even if you are maintaining a healthy weight, you most likely are doing something that is extremely detrimental to your health. You probably do it for hours upon hours each day and don’t give it a second thought.

What’s the dangerous habit? Sitting! Individuals spend record amounts of time sitting now and it may be killing us. Even if you fit in regular exercise time each week, if you are spending the rest of your time plopped down in a chair then you are at risk.

According to the Institute for Medicine and Public Health, it's likely that you spend a stunning 56 hours per week sitting on your bum. That’s an average of eight whopping hours per day idle in your seat.

A study from Australian researchers published two years ago found that spending more than four hours a day in front of a computer or television was associated with a doubling of serious heart problems, even among people who exercised regularly.

Martha Grogan, a cardiologist at the Mayo Clinic, concurs. She says “for people who sit most of the day, their risk of heart attack is about the same as smoking.”

Wow, that is staggering. And most likely comes as quite a shock to most. After all, we’ve been presented with guidelines that urge us to participate in three hours of brisk exercise a week in order to stay fit. If we do that, then we pat ourselves on the back and feel we have met our goals.

But based on this surprising data related to sitting, we can’t just meet our weekly exercise goals and then sit back. We must evaluate our entire daily physical activity efforts.

 "Independent of weight and independent of physical activity and all of these other things that can lead to long-term health problems, the more we sit, the more likely that bad things happen in the body," says Scott Kahan, MD, MPH, director of the National Center for Weight and Wellness in Washington, D.C.

Garry Sigman, MD, director of the pediatric obesity program of Loyola University Medical Center in Maywood, Ill., agrees. "We evolved from a place where we needed to walk around a lot and not sit still to survive, and now in modern society, there is more opportunity where we sit and that is not healthy for more than one reason," he says.

So, we must find a way to return to our ancestral beginnings while living in our modern world. For thousands of generations our environment demanded nearly constant physical movement in order to survive. We may not have that same survival need today but if we want to live a long, healthy life then we should return to that survival mode.

Here are some ways to slash our sitting times significantly and to move well beyond just our scheduled weekly exercise time.

• Watching t.v. This is a pretty obvious change. Stop watching so much t.v. We almost always sit when viewing the television. So, if you just can’t break ties with your much-loved weekly show, then at least modify your viewing time by watching while on a treadmill, or while standing.

• If you have a desk job, see if your company would be willing to give you a working treadmill work station.

• At your job, suggest walking meetings. Instead of the years-old tradition of meeting in a conference room and plopping down for hours on end, suggest taking your group meeting outdoors for a walk. You’ll be amazed how your brain can think outside-of-the-box too when your body is moving. It’s a win-win for both body and mind.

• Don’t just plop down in a fold up chair at your kids’ weekend sport activities. Stand or even pace throughout the game.

• Don’t send a co-worker an email or call them, walk to their desk and stand to discuss pertinent business.

• Instead of sitting on your couch while chatting on the phone with a friend, pace throughout your house.

• Don’t spend hours seated while playing video games. Enjoy an active version like Wii or Kinect.

• Set your phone timer to remind you to get up every 10 minutes, even if just for one minute. That can have significantly positive effects. Once you master this habit, consider changing it to a one minute break every five minutes that pass.

• If you have a disability that inhibits you from standing, please talk to a physician/physical therapist for movement ideas specific to your individual needs.

Easy Fix for Draft Under Your Door

Instructions:

Measure width of door.

Cut a piece of fabric that length plus 1" for 1/2 "seam allowance on each end and about 5" wide (depending on how big of a gap you have under your door).

 

Fold with wrong sides together lengthwise and serge leaving one end open.

Fill with dried pinto beans and sew end closed.

              - Provided by Mary Westmoreland

"How Do I Do It?"

by Gina Martin - Used by permission   I get questions like this often:  "So, can you tell me how you do it? :) how you manage to be a mother/raise children, grow more than a quick, average garden, read more books than many mothers manage to get around to, make all sorts of delicious recipes, and who knows how many other pursuits you have...home decorating? Sewing, canning, cleaning..."- Karissa In the past I wrote about How to Do It All - the answer to my frustrations to not getting everything done that I wish. I really don't do everything, even if it looks like it. Blogging can give a distorted picture of life. Like every other mom, I have to put food on the table. I just snap a picture of it (my children say that I take far too many pictures of food). And occasionally I pull out one of those photos and type up the recipe to share with all of you blog friends. But I hate to think that I might contribute to your discouragement because of blogging. Every mom is busy. I don't think I do anything more than most moms, I just write about it, and somehow that makes it appear like more. Like everyone else, including you, I wake up in the morning and do one thing, and then one more, and on through the day. I don't get nearly everything done that I wish. My to-do list is never all checked off. But with one thing at a time, something gets done. At the end of the day I read a few pages and somehow those few pages turn into books by the end of the year. One thing at a time. Or as Elisabeth Elliot used to say "Do the next thing." Of course there are many other facets. We all have seasons of life. We all have times when even the bare necessities of life are hard to accomplish, when even putting a meal on the table looks like an impossibility. Also our background and training make a huge impact on our present lives. I grew up in a large farming family. As the oldest daughter I had the experience of cooking vast amounts of food, doing huge piles of laundry, and canning bushels of tomatoes. I learned many shortcuts and today I can fly through a pile of ironing, zip through sewing a dress, and cook a meal while holding a baby. Maybe you had to start from scratch at learning homemaking skills. Give yourself a break and don't fall into the comparison trap. And waiting behind that is the Perfectionist Trap. I heard an older mom say that she was a good plodder. She was a talented woman with a many children who accomplished a huge amount. But she didn't have any secrets, she only said that she as a good plodder. Every morning she woke up, put one foot in front of another, and moved through her day. With years of faithfully, day after day, showing up, doing one thing at a time, the results are amazing. Plodding might not sound exciting. But I have seen its effectiveness.  Follow Gina on her blog at www.homejoys.blogspot.com.

Precious Gems

Compiled by Lois Breneman

Thanks, ladies, for your permission to include your children's quotes in Heart to Heart!

Amiya (7): "Mommy, did you know Jesus knows everyone's name in Spanish too!?"

 

I asked Malakai (7) if he liked his snack. His answer: "Okay, Mom, let me tell you something so you can know next time. If I eat all of it, that means I liked it and I ate all of it, so, you know..." ~ Danielle in Alabama

 

Malakai (7): "Do bosses have a job other than following people around all day?" ~ Danielle in Alabama

 

You know your 4 year old is growing up too fast when you tell her to go get the stool and she comes back in high heel shoes instead...  It works though. ~ Jennifer in Virginia

 

Me: "Hey, Charlotte, tell me some words that start with the letter A."
Charlotte (4): "B"
Me: "No, like Apple, Annabelle, Aquaman, or Apricot."
Charlotte: "Oh!  I know what an Apricot is!"
Me: "What is it?"
Charlotte: "It's when you choke on the food in your mouth...hey, did you know that the moon and the sun are friends, but the clouds don't like the sun?" ~ Promise in Virginia

 

Overheard at my house from the bedroom of a two year old not interested in taking a nap- "Knock, knock. Anybody home?" ~ Mary Beth in Virginia 

Five Year Old: "Mommy, when I grow up, I'm going to be a big sister, just like my Sissy!"
Ummm....it doesn't really work like that... ~ Amy in Virginia

 

Malakai (7): "Someone called me a weirdo at school."
Me: "Oh really, why?"
Malakai: "Cause I was doing something weird (giggles)." ~ Danielle in Alabama

 

Apparently the time has come to not ask this question anymore.....
Me: Austin, did you miss me at school today?
Austin (7): Nope. (Without a moment's hesitation, might I add?)
Me: Well...that's not very nice.
Austin: Sorry but I didn't!
And there you have it. ~ Emily in Virginia

 

I asked Savannah (7) to help me by feeding her one year old sister. She said, "Mom, she ate this whole bowl and wants something else and I haven't even gotten to sit down yet!"  Welcome to my world. ~ Lauren in Virginia

Homeschool funny of the day: When reading about Quakers in history in regards to war, I asked Andrew (12), "What are Quakers known for?" His answer...."Oatmeal." ~ Stefanie in Delaware

Don't Trash It! Fix It! Make It Last!

by Lois Breneman - Heart to Heart - February, 2015

We are currently in the middle of completely remodeling our kitchen, which is so exciting!  The fun part is that it is scheduled to be finished on my birthday, if all goes as planned.  We are, however, keeping all of our white appliances, knowing they will most likely provide us with more years of service.

My husband and I are doing as much tear-out on our own as possible.  As we removed our dishwasher yesterday, I was reminded how several years ago the plastic silverware holder broke in three different areas.  There was a hole in the bottom of three dividers of the silverware holder, which meant some of the flatware slid right through and into the bottom of the dishwasher.

Looking straight down into one divider, this is how it looked:

My mechanical engineer husband was always one to fix everything, and has saved us so much money through the years, but his solution for this problem is something anyone could easily do.  He just happened to think of it, but I will gladly share with you if it will help your dishwasher live a little longer, and save your family some money.

Here's How the Problem Was Solved:

Using a stiff plastic notebook, he carefully cut a piece to fit into each divider.  This shows the bottom and about one to two inches up one side of the divider.  He cut and creased it with a box cutter.  Here are two views of his solution.

The end result for each of those three holes:

A problem like this might prompt many people to either order a new silverware holder or even toss out the dishwasher, when it only required a simple repair.   With an easy solution like this, you could have more cash to spend in other useful ways, and who doesn't need that?

So before you toss out a large or small appliance, get your whole family, including your children, thinking how it could be fixed.  That sounds like some interesting dinner table discussion.  Spur on the brain-storming discussion with the promise to put the money saved toward a family vacation or another family outing.

Five Best Valentine Gifts

by Dr. Dave Peterson, LPC
http://drdavepeterson.com/
Used by permission

#1. Pray Together about Anything, Any Time, at Any Place

Praying together brings you closer together to God and one another. Pray together about anything, anytime, at any place.

 

An assignment at a marriage seminar was to ask your spouse to share a time when you felt especially close recently. Dutifully I asked Carolyn. She said, “Remember the time we were driving down the road discussing a concern about one of our children. You said you did not know what to do and led us in prayer for wisdom. I really felt especially close to you at that time.” I remembered that occasion. I assure you I did not close my eyes while driving.

We do a lot together that promotes closeness. I took note that this was special, and we now pray together about anything, anytime, at any place.

People who involve God through prayer together in their everyday lives report increasingly closer relationships.

Picture source: www.flickr.com/photos/paullew/12517504814

#2. – Express Affection at the Door Upon Arrivals and Departures

Expressing affection at the door upon arrivals and departures takes very little time and some energy that brings big dividends to your relationship.  This demonstration of affection and love only takes moments. The pleasant memory while you are apart can last for hours mixed with the anticipation of the return.

There is not a lot of commitment in this world. Commitment in marriage is a major motivator to keep it strong. It’s good for the children to observe as well, for they feel secure.

A few moments of affection at the door can make a whole day go better.

Photo Source:/www.flickr.com/photos/hamedmasoumi/2263962161/

#3. – Say “I Love You” at the End of Each Phone Call or Text

Marriages can use more expressions of love. It wouldn’t hurt for the world to hear it as well. End each phone call or text with “I love you,” no matter who might be listening.

End even a disagreeable conversation, with “I love you.” That means, ”I am still committed to you even though I don’t like you much right now.” “I love you” returns a blessing for an insult.

Love works through the tough times until you like them again.

“I love you” creates a positive atmosphere of purity, respect, gentleness, harmony, and kindness.

Life is good with love.

Source: I Peter 3:1-10

Picture source: www.flickr.com/photos/sevgik/2233606413

#4. “Whatever You Want to Do Together” Spouse Day

This gift is a day together participating with your spouse in whatever they would like to do. The day may have scheduled events, be spontaneous, or have elements of both, whatever they prefer.  We call this day “A Carolyn’s Day.”

 

This can be dangerous. For example, “A Carolyn’s Day” usually includes visiting antique stores. I don’t like, nor usually visit antique stores for they look like piles of stuff I don’t want. Furthermore, they don’t have any written descriptions. I like museums because the objects are described, like “This spoon was used by John Uptight, circa. 1930.” Wow, a spoon used by John Uptight. I may have no idea who John Uptight is, but this is his spoon, not any old spoon in a pile. However, this is Carolyn’s ““Whatever You Want to Do Together Spouse Day,” so away we go.

Really, it is delightful to learn new things about Carolyn’s interests, even antiques, which bring back memories she likes to share.

I think you also will find that this day is anticipated and builds pleasant memories.

Picture source: www.flickr.com/photos/61423903@N06/8084060025

 #5. One-a-Day Love Respect

Write a list of your reasons you love and respect your spouse. You don’t need to write it on the wall, just begin sharing one item a day from the list like a vitamin pill for the relationship. Instead of showing the whole list, why use it all at once, express appreciation, love, respect, thanks, and how you value them once a day. Do not ask for reciprocity, just give thanks.

 

The one-a-day thanks/love/ respect list is usually the first assignment of the initial counseling session. Many begin to turn around their anxiety, depression and marriages in one week.

Make the list and start sharing, see what it does for your relationship.

Picture source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jstar/409405305/

Solution to Keeping Bathroom and Kitchen Sinks Clean

by Lois Breneman
Heart to Heart - 2015

Most households, I would guess, deal daily with keeping the bathroom sink clean.  Soap scum and toothpaste can make quite a messy and germ-filled sink. 

So what is a good solution?  I found this handy and inexpensive little soap dispensing palm brush in the grocery store, and it tackles the problem perfectly.  I bought one for each bathroom and sink, and find it to be most helpful.

Enlist your children to clean out the sink after they brush their teeth.  They just might find brushing the sink more fun than brushing their teeth, and they will be learning how to be responsible for cleaning up after themselves.  They will also be helping to slow down the germs in your home.  Hopefully this will mean less illness in your family, and they can all help in being part of the solution.

When introducing a new job or concept like this to your children, these steps may make it "take" more easily:
1. First show them how to do it.
2. Have the child do it while you watch (and give advice).
3. Have the child do the job alone. 
4. Inspect the job when the child finishes.

Soon your child will be doing the job out of habit, and helpfulness to the family so everyone will be healthier and happier.

After almost filling the palm brush with dishwashing liquid, I added about five drops of immune boosting essential oil to boost the cleaning effect.  Even adding melaleuca (tea tree) oil or lemon essential oil will help with the effectiveness of the cleaning power.

Reduce Your Problems by up to 50% by Releasing the Past

by Dr. Dave Peterson, LPC
http://drdavepeterson.com/
Used by permission

We could effectively reduce the number of problems experienced in life by up to one third if we released our past. If we release the past with forgiveness, accepting forgiveness, trusting, and reconciling, only when it is warranted, and learn from ours and others’ mistakes so that we don’t repeat them in the present, then we might reduce our present problems by fifty percent. Would your life be better if problems were reduced by up to fifty percent and all you needed to deal with were present and future problems.

Many prefer not to release the embarrassments, failures, hurts, sins, and traumatic events of their past. Some fear to release the past thinking it would create more problems. The past might create more problems if not released safely. Others would release the past if they knew how to do so safely. There are those who deal with their past and live for today with hope for tomorrow. Would you like to join these?

Some events in the past may be hard to release because they have all the elements of embarrassment, failure, hurt, sin, and trauma  in them. As I have counseled for over 35 years I have found that most people have some blight in their past. Past events may be a growth and maturing element, or they may be your secret to cover up. Covering a secret can use energy, time, and money.

Someone put the past in perspective well when they said, “If life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” Attention, energy, resources and time are better spent on today and tomorrow.

I made a list of things I learned through an experience in my past about myself, others, and God. My list had 143 observations to apply in my life. This was a crash educational experience that has served me and others well as I have counseled over the years.

Releasing the past has freed me from many problems and allowed me to help others.

Question: Would you agree the past can be a character builder, rather than destroyer?
 Is it an overstatement to say we could reduce our problems by up to fifty percent by releasing the past and not repeating it?
Source: 2 Corinthians 5:17, 18

New King James Version (NKJV)
17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.
18 Now all things are of God, who has reconsiled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation,

Treat Your Spouse at Least as Well as You Treat People at Church or Work

by Dr. Dave Peterson, LPC

http://drdavepeterson.com - Used by permission

A person in marital counseling was beginning to understand when they said, “I get it, what you are saying is that I should treat my spouse at least as well as I treat the people at work, or church.” At least this was a good start.

Think about how you treat people OUTSIDE the home. You greet them, “Good morning,” not “Murmur, mutter.” You say, “Please” and “Thank you,” not, “Give me that.” You call people by name, “Charles,” not “Hey you.” You use “Yes, Sir” and “Ma’am,” not “Yup, okay.” You converse with others, rather than give them the silent treatment. You may reply to, “When do you need this done?” with, “I needed it yesterday, but when do you think you can get it done?” You don’t yell across the room, you walk over to people and speak with a gentle and quiet voice. Differences are dealt with privately, not in front of an audience. You take every opportunity to encourage others in their work. You listen without interruption. You suggest solutions to problems and discuss them.

You do this every day at work, why not at home? These twelve little courtesies raise the probability you will keep your job. Maybe these ways would keep your marriage strong and your children from rebelling.

Some say, “Yes, but that is work. Home should be where you relax, let your guard down, be yourself.” I’d like to tell you that I never let my guard down, but I will also tell you it doesn’t go well when I do. When I do practice these twelve simple courtesies I find I do relax at home, I find pleasure being there.

Practice these courtesies for thirty days at home and they will become as natural there as they are at work. See if it doesn’t make a great difference in your home life.

Question: Have you faced a moment recently where lack of basic courtesy was easier than taking the high road? How did you convince yourself to take the high road and see it through? What was the result? Please  leave a comment.

Source: Ephesians 5:21-33

New King James Version (NKJV)

²¹ submitting to one another in the fear of God.
²² Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. ²³ For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. ²⁴ Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, ²⁶ that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, ²⁷ that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. ²⁸ So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹ For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. ³⁰ For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. ³¹ “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” ³² This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. ³³ Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.