Saturday, June 29, 2013

Help with Sibling Rivalry

by Lois Breneman ~ Heart to Heart ~ 2013

I like the advice I once heard Dr. James Dobson give concerning sibling rivalry.  He said something to this effect:  When your children are quarreling, have them sit down and look them straight in the eye as you tell them how in their life they will surely encounter some people in the world who will disagree with them and may not even like them.  Then let them know that the people inside the walls of your home are on the same team and we have each other's best interest at heart and will support each other, no matter what.  Assure them that when no one else will stick up for them, their parents, sisters and brothers will, and I might add that their grandparents will!

Another piece of advice I heard somewhere was this:  When your children are fighting, put a stop to it and have each one say one nice thing about the other person, such as a good character quality, a talent, or positive remark concerning the other person.

When your children misbehave, tell them you love them too much to allow them to misbehave like that.

It's too bad I never heard these remedies when my children were young.  I do remember having them wash a window after fighting one another, with one on the inside of the kitchen door window and the other on the outside.  It wasn't always a surefire way of disciplining.  Sometimes they would stick out their tongues and make faces, but every now and then it did make them laugh!

Whatever quarreling and fighting our children went through with each other as kids, it's worth it now to see them all getting along with each other wonderfully, and loving each other's children as well.  We just enjoyed a week together at the beach earlier this month, and it was such a joy to be together and enjoy our family of thirteen in 2013, with being blessed with our newest grandchild only three months earlier!  We try as much as possible to get all of the family together at least once or twice every year, even if we are all spread out.  Now that John is retired, we are hoping to spend more time with each family for a week at a time.  They tell us about various projects they have for us to lend them a hand.  We really enjoy helping them and spending time with each one, and are thankful that they ask us to come.

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