Monday, May 2, 2011

Our Miracle Grandbaby

by Lois Breneman (Grandmother Lois)

The month of April has been like a whirlwind for our family, but the Lord's presence has been with us all the way. He has been so faithful in answering the prayers of hundreds of family and friends, as well as many we have never met, as we all prayed for our precious newborn grandson, Andrew.

Our fourth grandbaby was due to be born on May 10, however, he was born five weeks early by C-section, after his mother felt less movement, fearing he was in some type of danger. We are all so thankful that our daughter-in-law, Rachael, noticed in the middle of the night how his lack of movement might be a legitimate concern. It definitely was, and that decision to go to the doctor's as a safeguard early the next morning may have saved his life. His heart rate had dropped from 140 down to 65 and back up while in the doctor's office, and an ultrasound showed that he wasn't responsive to stimulation, so Rachael, was immediately hospitalized for a C-section.

We were so thankful that Andrew was born at a whopping 5 pounds, 6 ounces - rather hefty for a preemie, arriving five weeks early! But in the next few weeks so many physical alarms were set off in his tiny body, and each one was a mystery to the finest doctors. They didn't see any reason for him not to be breathing at birth, but that is how his first few seconds of life began. A few compressions on his tiny chest started him breathing right away, and he was on a ventilator for six hours. When the doctors found his kidneys were not functioning properly, he was taken to Children's Hospital an hour and a half from home when he was less than two days old. His lungs and intestines were not quite ready to do their job, but those problems soon straightened out as so many prayers went up for him. 


Next he was not producing enough blood platelets, and a blood transfusion twice, before he started making enough of his own. That was a rather uncertain time. We were all relieved when an MRI showed there was no brain damage. Again the doctors were puzzled, because Andrew seemed very healthy, but these malfunctions kept popping up. 

The first two weeks were like a roller coaster ride with a good report one day and a bad one the next. He was also on a feeding tube because he was too tired and sleepy to take the full amount when nursing or taking breast milk from a bottle. So whatever he didn't drink on his own was put down the feeding tube, so he wouldn't lose weight. 

The third week was not as huge of a crisis, but he desperately needed to gain weight every day and get off the feeding tube before he could come home. Andrew is a very easy going and content baby, but he grabbed hold of his feeding tube twice and pulled it right out. The second yank was the night before Easter. After that a resident doctor, sent by God, suggested that Andrew be fed more often. He immediately stepped up his eating, and gained weight so well that the feeding tube was a thing of the past, and he was able to come home two days after Easter, on the day that he turned three weeks of age.

For the first week of Andrew's life, three year old Daniel was being cared for by other family members nearby. Then my husband and I drove to their home several states away, to help our son, Jeff, take care for Daniel and take charge of the household, since Jeff couldn't afford to use up all his vacation time. After a week, my husband had to go back home to work. Although he is partially retired, his company has a big job for him to work on right now, so he's temporarily working full time again. I am staying to help Jeff and Rachael's little family, at their request, for thirty-one days. This will be the longest period of time my husband and I have ever been apart in almost forty-three years of our marriage, but it's certainly for a worthy cause. 


I'm so happy to be able to help them, and my two weeks with Daniel has been such fun! Now that Andrew and Rachael are home, I am loving all the cuddling I am able to provide, while Rachael has more time for big brother, Daniel. While they take afternoon naps, I am able to take care of Andrew. He is still too tired to work hard enough to nurse full time, so he is taking most of his mom's breast milk by bottle, until he is stronger. That means Jeff and I are able to help feed him by bottle more often.  I can hardly take my eyes off of his sweet face while feeding him!

Last week Jeff, Daniel and I went to Children's Hospital and stayed in the Ronald McDonald House two nights, so their little family could be together again. It was the first time in two weeks that Rachael and Daniel had seen each other. He has done amazingly well though! Jeff and I each got to spend hours cuddling and feeding Andrew bottles of breast milk. Volunteers from various churches in the area brought lunch and dinner each day for families of patients. It was such an appreciated service.

Andrew only whimpered a little at birth, and rarely cried at all during the first week or two, but he is now crying rather heartily when he is hungry, and we love that! We are measuring his feedings and he is exceeding what the medical staff expects, so we know he is gaining weight.

While Andrew is sleeping he makes such adorable squeaking sounds, so I sometimes lovingly call him, "Pipsqueak." He is a bundle of squeaks, smiles, stretches, yawns, miracles, and sweetness!

So many precious Scriptures were like a rock to us during this time of uncertainty. The fact that this little family had experienced two miscarriages in the previous year made it all the more difficult to think of them losing another little one. But the Lord gave us such a perfect peace that passes all understanding, and this trial has definitely strengthened our trust in Him. Psalm 139 was a comfort to us, reminding us that God Himself formed Andrew in his mother's womb, and we knew that He still had Andrew in His Hands and He alone was completely in charge of his life. Ephesians 3:20 encouraged us as well, saying that the Lord was able to do exceeding abundantly above all we could ask or think. The next verse (21) says, "Unto Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus, to all generations."

We will never know why all of this happened, but we know God had a special reason. Certainly many good things have come out of this experience. I am enjoying five weeks with my two grandsons, and loving every minute of it. It's hard to take my eyes off of this beautiful miracle baby as I feed him and help care for him, and Daniel and I have been having lots of good times together as well. Our trust in the Lord has been increased. Rachael had the opportunity to meet so many people at Children's Hospital and talk with them, and heard so many miracle stories of other babies. She was sharing with me how she wrote notes of appreciation to all of Andrew's doctors and nurses, as well as other mothers at the hospital whom she met with very sick babies. She wrote out scripture verses in many, and always mentioned to others how the prayers of so many people were making all the difference in the world for her and Jeff during this most difficult time, and giving them such peace even during the most uncertain days when they could have easily lost their baby.

We are still so humbled by the outpouring of love and prayers by so many dear people, even many around the world! Many started prayer chains or sent the prayer requests to a long list of their own family and friends. Jeff and Rachael's family has healthy dinners coming to their home for the next three weeks, enough to spill over into Jeff's lunchbox for work, which gives him more rest and holding time. In the meantime, I am enjoying helping with Andrew and Daniel, as well as doing laundry, kitchen duty, and cleaning, trying my best to do serve this precious family in doing whatever is needed from this thankful Grammie!

Kangroo Care / SIDS / A Newborn's Conversation with God

KANGAROO CARE
Information from The Premature Baby Book by William Sears, M.D., Robert Sears, M.D., James Sears, M.D., and Martha Sears, R.N.



Kangaroo Care is a method of holding your baby skin-to-skin, with a blanket or garment wrapped around Mother's body, in order to help a baby thrive and feel secure at the beginning of his life. For preemies, Kangaroo Care is especially vital, but all newborn babies will benefit greatly. Fathers and other people can also provide Kangaroo Care.

Science says Kangarooed babies thrive so much better. They gain weight faster, leave the hospital sooner, cry less, have more stable temperatures, are more alert, sleep better, breathe better, have less infections, and have more stable heart rates. Parents, especially mothers, are less depressed, are more comfortable in the NICU, are more confident in caregiving abilities, have a more positive attitude toward their baby, perceive their baby as less abnormal, interact more with their baby, feel more important, and bond better.






SLEEPING WITH A FAN IN BABY'S ROOM CAN LOWER SIDS BY 72 %
SIDS deaths have dropped by more than half in the U.S. since 1992, when parents were first told to put babies to sleep on their backs, but using a fan in baby's room can decrease the numbers even more. A nurse at Children's Hospital mentioned using a fan, and this link backs up what she said.


A NEWBORN'S CONVERSATION WITH GOD
Author unknown

The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy."
God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."

Again the small child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand
when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"
God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care your angel will teach you how to speak."

"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."

"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life?"
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you."

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell my angel's name."
God said, "You will simply call her 'Mom.' "


A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"
God said, "Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."

Practical Tips and Tidbits

I hope at least a few of these tips will help make your life a little easier.
A tip we came up with this morning as a 1 1/2 hour trip was necessary for an infant checkup: If you are bottle feeding or using a bottle to feed a preemie breast milk, and need to warm up a bottle where hot water is unavailable, take along a glass-lined Thermos bottle filled with the hottest tap water possible for warming up a bottle (presently in a cooler). The water in a glass-lined Thermos will stay hot. When ready to warm the bottle, pour the water into a container larger than the bottle (preferably with a lid to prevent spilling) and set the bottle of milk in the container until warm.

If you have trouble getting your children into the tub before bedtime, tell them that the last one to take a bath must clean it.

A fun activity during bath time for older babies and toddlers is to blow bubbles for them to burst in the tub. Sometimes they will land in the soapy water and remain for a few seconds, which is such fun for little ones.

When a toddler hates to get out of the tub, and his fingers are shriveled like a prune, simply pull the plug.

If you want your children to begin helping you with housework, play the "waiter and waitress" game, with Mommy and Daddy as the customers.

If you have a kitchen table with grooves in it, as part of the design, but crumbs of food are difficult to remove from the cracks, use a lamb's wool duster for dry crumbs, before wiping the table with a clean dishcloth.

If you want to ensure that your family will eat what you have prepared for dinner, avoid sugary snacks (give only fresh fruits and vegetables), and wait until they are good and hungry.

If dinner is going to be a little late, boil or saute an onion. The aroma will tell your family that dinner is on the way, and hopefully you won't have to hear those dreaded questions, "What's for dinner?" or "When will dinner be ready?"


To get children to eat cereal using less sugar, mix equal amounts of sugar and powdered stevia in a salt shaker. They can gradually be weaned off sugar, as more and more stevia replaces the sugar, which breaks down resistance to colds, flu, and other illnesses.

Let your children or any group of children you are working with know that whoever says, "Me first," will be automatically be last.
If you can't get your kids to clean up after themselves, hide everything you pick up in a secret place and charge a nickle or dime an item as ransom.

Train children not to complain or tattle, by giving them a limited supply of complaint tickets. Each time they complain or tattle, they must give you a ticket before you will listen. The child will think twice before using up one of his complaints.

Keep a journal of your first year of marriage, because by your tenth year of marriage, it may feel like in your entire married life you haven't had ten minutes to yourselves.


When you finally find something after looking all over the place for it, put it back in the first place you looked, because that's probably where it belongs anyway.

If you want to be discreet about the number of birthday candles on a cake, arrange them in the form of a question mark.

Attach an inexpensive thermometer on the outside of your bedroom windows. You will be able to make better decisions in choosing what to wear. A thermometer outside the kitchen window or a room where you spend a lot of time, is helpful as well.
Keep suitcases smelling fresh by storing unwrapped bars of soap or fabric softener sheets in them in between trips.

For the least expensive and most effective deodorant, put about 1 teaspoon of baking soda in your one hand, and dribble a few drops of water to make a paste. Rub the paste under the arms for a safe, non-aluminum protection. One application may be effective for up to five days.

Packing an extension cord for trips will eliminate the problem of cords not reaching in hotel rooms or wherever you are staying..

When windshield wipers begin to wear down, rubbing briskly with sandpaper will extend their life. When dirty wipers streak your windshield, scrub them with baking soda and water.

Long before another baby is due to arrive in your family, find small inexpensive gifts for the other children at yard sales, Goodwill, or a dollar store. Wrap them and give to the older children after the new baby is born. This is a great idea for grandparents and friends to consider in giving gifts. I've been having fun giving my three year old grandson "surprises" as his baby brother is home from the hospital now.

If your child's slide has lost its speed, rub a sheet of waxed paper on it and watch the difference. Even the waxed linings from cereal will work.

If you have a hard time clearly seeing a splinter in a finger, dab some iodine on the spot. The splinter will darken and you will be able to locate and remove it more easily.

If shoelaces lose their plastic tip, dip the frayed end in glue and shape to a point.

If You Never ...

Author unknown - Thanks to Paula Archer in Nebraska for sending this!

If you never felt pain, then how would you know that I am a Healer?

If you never had to pray, How would you know that I am a Deliverer?

If you never had a trial, how could you call yourself an overcomer?

If you never felt sadness, How would you know that I am a Comforter?

If you never made a mistake, How would you know that I am a forgiver?

If you knew all, How would you know that I will answer your questions?

If you never were in trouble, How would you know that I will come to your rescue?

If you never were broken, Then how would you know that I can make you whole?

If you never had a problem,How would you know that I can solve them?

If you never had any suffering, Then how would you know what I went through?

If you never went through the fire, Then how would you become pure?

If I gave you all things, How would you appreciate them?

If I never corrected you, How would you know that I love you?

If you had all power, Then how would you learn to depend on me?

If your life was perfect, Then what would you need me for?

Love,
Jesus
 

Three Good Ideas for Communication

April 22, 2011 - This tip comes from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN. You can sign up at www.biblicalparenting.org. What are some helpful communication rules in your family? Click here to tell us about it. Used by permission


Learn How to Start
The way you present an issue often determines the response. Sometimes it's best to address a problem immediately, while other times waiting a few hours is more appropriate. Wisely choose a time, place, and approach with the goal of not just rebuking, but correcting, and finding resolution. "Lisa, I'd like to talk about the way you treated me earlier. Is now a good time or should we talk after dinner?"

Learn When to Stop
Once a dialogue has developed, have discernment to know when to stop. Some parents feel like they must win an argument or come to resolution by the end of the conversation so they end up pushing too hard. Other times emotions get too involved. Still other parents end a simple correction with preaching, bringing up the past, or making exaggerated statements about the offense.

In any case, it's important for parents to know when to take a break or simply stop the conversation. "I think we better stop here. Things are getting pretty tense. We need to continue this conversation, but let's take a break for now. Maybe we'll think of some other ideas in the meantime to help resolve this problem." Learning when to stop during conflict is a very important skill.


Learn How to Listen
Conflict represents opportunity. Children watch parents handle conflict and observe how they resolve differences. Listening and affirming a young person's thinking is an honoring step in conflict management.

"I understand you'd discipline your sister differently. Your ideas make sense. At this point, I have to make the decision and I'm going to emphasize something different, but I appreciate your ideas." Affirming or validating a child's thinking or reasoning is helpful for their development.

As you dialogue with your kids, you must learn to tolerate criticism. Many discussions you have will open the door for your teen to criticize you. Don't feel threatened or take these jabs personally. Use them to discuss issues and explain your decisions. If you can be transparent enough to use yourself as an example, your children will learn much more about life.

Humor

HOW TO PUT AN END TO SPRING FEVER MISCHIEF

Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire.

     Much to their relief she smiled and said, "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper."

     Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said, "First Question: Which tire?"
 
HOW TO PUT AN END TO CHURCH GOSSIP

     Gertrude, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business.
Several members did not approve of her extra- curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Frank, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. 

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup truck in from of Gertrude's house -- walked home --- and left it there all night.    

Your gotta love Frank for such creativity!

Sewing Baby Bibs

Thanks to Debbie Klinect in Florida for sending these practical links!

Precious Gems

April, 2011
 
Ladies, if you would like to e-mail me your cute kids' quotes to be included in Heart to Heart, please do!
 
Last night while getting ready for bed, Kamyrn (4), was putting on lipstick. I asked her why she needed that for bed. She stated that if she got married in her dream, she wanted to get lipstick on the boy. ~ Lori in Ohio
 
This morning while I was in the shower Gracie (8) locked herself out of the house as she was going on the porch to play her guitar. She later tells me and sings to me the song she made up out there. "I'm all alone out here with nothing but my guitar and my dog. I hear a coyote and see a spider and I'm scared, but God is with me........" Soooo funny! ~ Penny in Virginia
 
Quotes from My Grandson, Daniel (3):
Daniel has a newborn baby brother. Before he came home, Daniel sat in the baby swing that is all ready for Andrew. I was surprised to see him sitting in it. I smiled at him and asked Daniel, "What are you doing?" Daniel told me in a matter-of-fact manner, "I'm just seeing if this fits for the summer."
 
Daniel was playing with his toys as I was in another room. Daniel came in and said, "Grammie, come and join my party at the Apple Festival! We'll go to the party barn!" When I got to the family room, I asked, "If this is an Apple Festival, where are all the apples?" He said, "Grammie, you can be a tree, and I'll pick apples from you!" Well, at least I was wearing a red shirt!

I was reading a Golden Book to Daniel before naptime - one I used to read to his Daddy. A picture showed two bunnies in a car with a longer-than-normal tail pipe. Daniel asked, "Whose tail is that?"

Daniel's mommy used to talk a good bit to Baby Andrew while he was still in her tummy. After Andrew was born, Daniel had just eaten lunch with his mommy at the Ronald McDonald House, and she commented on his tummy being bigger. Then Daniel asked, "Mommy, are you sad that Baby Andrew took away your big belly?


As we waited for Daniel's mommy and baby brother to come home from the hospital, early one morning I asked Daniel how he ended up in bed with his Daddy. He was still rather groggy, and looking a bit confused at my question, he replied, "Well, you shouldn't ask me that, because I don't know."

This next comment came because I've been caring for Daniel in his home for the past two weeks, while his mommy is at Children's Hospital with his preemie baby brother: Daniel pulled up his shirt sleeves, and said to me at breakfast, "My real mommy said I should pull up my sleeves when I eat almond butter and jelly toast."
 
I've been giving Daniel lots of small surprises during my visit, saving most for when Baby Andrew gets home. One of those surprises was Wonder Dough which came in pink and blue. We mixed it all together to make purple. The second time we played with it, Daniel, asked, "Where's the blue?" I explained how we had mixed it together to make purple, and he asked, pleadingly, "Can we unmix it?"

One the evening when Andrew and Mommy got home, when Daniel was asked if he would help change Andrew's diaper, he said, "Maybe I need gloves for that job!"